The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks
Published by Three Rivers Press on 2003
Genres: Humor, General, Form, Parodies
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The Zombie Survival Guide is your key to survival against the hordes of undead who may be stalking you right now. Fully illustrated and exhaustively comprehensive, this book covers everything you need to know, including how to understand zombie physiology and behavior, the most effective defense tactics and weaponry, ways to outfit your home for a long siege, and how to survive and adapt in any territory or terrain.
Top 10 Lessons for Surviving a Zombie Attack
1. Organize before they rise! 2. They feel no fear, why should you? 3. Use your head: cut off theirs. 4. Blades don’t need reloading. 5. Ideal protection = tight clothes, short hair. 6. Get up the staircase, then destroy it. 7. Get out of the car, get onto the bike. 8. Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert! 9. No place is safe, only safer. 10. The zombie may be gone, but the threat lives on.
Don’t be carefree and foolish with your most precious asset—life. This book is your key to survival against the hordes of undead who may be stalking you right now without your even knowing it. The Zombie Survival Guide offers complete protection through trusted, proven tips for safeguarding yourself and your loved ones against the living dead. It is a book that can save your life.
Quick! The Dead have risen! What next? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?!?! If you are smart, you would have read this book to prepare yourself waaaaaay ahead of time, and you will be ready to either defend your turf or escape to a safe place.
This book offers everything that you need to know if zombies should ever roam the earth. Max Brooks goes into a LOT of details that you will need to know. Such as the best way to escape. The best tools to use against zombies. I always have though a gun, but no that is not the BEST method.
Brooks also shows you how to escape should you need to. And a big ass truck zooming straight outta dodge is NOT the best way. In fact, a car itself is not the best way as millions of other people will have the same idea and you will be stuck in the worst traffic since time began, and then zombies will catch up to you and well. You will be zombie food. SO you need to prepare to make sure you make it to where you are going alive and with zero bites. Or you will end up in the zombie documentary “The Walking Dead” you don’t want THAT, do you? The question remains if you are escaping from a city the size of say LA where do you go? The sad fact is probably nowhere. I mean think about it how would you get OUT or even if you did where is there TO go in the desolate southern California wasteland that is covered by suburbia for miles on end and that is probably in all likelihood crawling with the living dead. So you have accepted your fate that your sorry ass is stuck in LA or New York or my case Cleveland so where TO go to ensure you have the maximum chance of survival? The book explains where not TO go mostly avoid the damn hospital. I dunno why people run to the hospital in times of crisis. But yeah that is where most people will be reanimating so BAD BAD IDEA. I must admit I was relieved when he said the inner city is the best place to go. That is like 95 percent of Cleveland, so I am safe if I can just get to the inner city without some white dude biting me. ANYWAY, there are places to go and places to avoid, and he explains the cons and pros of each and on how to choose and eliminate zombies and how to prepare for the long haul. Because it will be a long ass haul cause no help is coming. When I realized that I would have to survive the frigid Cleveland winters without modern electricity maybe I am tempted to try and make my way south but nahhhh that will be eight months of zombies being frozen so ANYWAY….
But suppose you decide to stay and to defend your turf? He shows you how to do that also. He gives an in-depth explanation of the types of weapons that are best in this scenario and how to defend your house or the prison that you and some other trusted people have decided to make your new home.
He even explains that you will need to grow your food. This makes me weep. I was manged to kill a CATUS plant so I dunno about a garden but if my life depended on it I bet I will remember to water it.
This book is a good primer for what to do in the event of a zombiepolyse. Don’t let your survival stop there, however. To survive you need to know all you can. So learn, learn, learn and may God be with all of us.